For some reason, community college students have class tomorrow – the day before Thanksgiving. Tragic. If your teacher didn’t cancel class and you’re deciding whether or not to attend, allow me to convince you to start your weekend early.
1. How is it fair that community college students pay less for tuition, but go to class more? Um. I’m not a mathematician, but that doesn’t add up.
2. Skipping class tomorrow allows you to not have that “school the next day” feeling that you probably have right now.
3. Getting rid of this feeling would allow you to do whatever you want with this precious night. Did you know that there’s a new John Mulaney stand up special on Netflix called the Comeback Kid? Or like, you could watch documentaries. I suggest Hotline, Culture High, Spies of Mississippi, and Fed Up. Notice that I wrote and, not or. You don’t have class tomorrow. You can watch it all.
4. You can listen to my new Spotify playlist – click here – and then make your own instead of going to class. Maybe you should make a playlist with songs that all relate to food. Or, one with music that you’re thankful for. Or, a playlist about colonialism, because that’s what Thanksgiving is founded on. Too far?
5. You need to skip class to make time to take every buzzfeed quiz so you have something to talk about at dinner. If there’s an awkward silence, I’ll just casually let people know that when it comes to Mean Girls characters, I’m totally a Kevin G.
6. You need to figure out what food you’re making. Personally, I’ve taken on the responsibility of making some stellar macaroni and cheese. I bookmarked a recipe in safari on my phone in July. I’ve been ready.
7. Oh, and you need to get your rest before feasting. It’s crucial that you don’t stress yourself out with class beforehand.
8. Out of all the pants you own – which are the stretchiest? What do you mean you don’t know?! Don’t worry, you still have time to figure out which ones will be the best to wear for Thursday’s dinner. But it’ll take time, so looks like you’re going to have to miss class.
9. Your teachers don’t want to be there, either.
10. Not being in class is a great thing to be thankful for.